Rules For Living With The Grown Ups
by Blumacaw13
Summary: Got bored thinking of ideas.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I've seen people do this and I thought 'Why Not Give It A Try?'**

**Rules for living with the Grown Ups**

**Rule 1: Make sure you don't leave any make-up around Nick.**

Nick: *Putting on lipstick and eyeliner humming a Ke$ha song*

Roxanne: Nick, what the hell?!

Nick: *turns the lipstick and sees Roxanne's name on it* It wasn't me, I swear. *Throws it into the sink*

**Rule 2: Don't piss Braden off.**

Marcus: Hey Braden!

Braden: What?

Marcus: Do you know there's been a hot chick following us for like, twelve blocks now?

Braden: *Looks around* Where?

Marcus: Just kidding!

Braden: *Picks him up by his collar* don't lie to me.

Marcus: Okay…

Braden: *Drops him*

**Rule 3: If you want to live, make sure Eric gets the last cookie.**

Lenny: *Is looking into the cookie jar* Hey, who ate all the cookies?

Eric: *Runs in with cookie crumbs on his face* someone ate all the cookies?! *Turns and sees Higgins with the last cookie*

Higgins: *Sees this* Uh oh.

Eric: *Tackles him* MY COOKIE!

Higgins: No, it's mine; I've had dibs on it since the 20th century!

Eric: Ewww.

Higgins: Psych. *Eats cookie and gets tackled again*

**Rule 4: If Rob is watching a movie that makes him cry, don't sit next to him.**

Higgins: *Sits next to Rob watching Titanic*

Kurt: I wouldn't sit there if I were you.

Higgins: Why not?!

Lenny: May God be with you.

*Later*

Rob: *Crying clinging to Marcus, who looks peeved.*

Kurt and Lenny: *Laughing uncontrollably*

Higgins: Thanks, guys.

Kurt: We tried to warn ya.

**Rule 5: Don't break the concentration of Lenny and Kurt while they're having a staring contest. You will be slapped.**

Lenny and Kurt: *Staring at each other with bloodshot eyes*

Nick: *Bumps Lenny's chair and he blinks*

Kurt: *Fist pumps* I won!

Lenny: *Growls and slaps Nick leaving a red mark on his face* You broke my concentration!

Nick: I didn't do anything!

Lenny: *Spits in his eye*

Nick: AHH!

**Rule 6: If you hear Higgins scream, don't worry, he probably just teased Braden.**

Higgins: *Screams*

Lenny and Rob: *Turn their heads around the corner to see Higgins in a headlock.* what happened?

Braden: He told me I looked like a goat.

Lenny: Good enough.

Higgins: Can one of you please…help me?

Kurt: Sorry. *Walks away with Lenny*

Higgins: NO DON'T GO! HELP!

**Rule 7: If you're friends with Sally and you want her not to argue with Eric and she says you're hot, tell her you're gay.**

Sally: *To Eric* I saw the HOTTEST guy today.

Eric: Gay, dead or a cartoon?

Sally: Bisexual.

Eric: its okay, he's gonna be dead soon. *Leaves*

Sally: Eric!

**Rule 8: If you go on Nick's bus, your life is in danger.**

Marcus: I can't believe you talked me into getting into Nick's bus.

Lenny: C'mon, you'll enjoy it.

Nick: Okay, guys sit tight and enjoy the race.

*Later*

Marcus: *gets off the bus with frizzy hair, then vomits.*

Lenny: That's nasty.

**Rule 9: Just because its fun, doesn't mean you can take everything out on Higgins.**

Marcus: Hey, Lenny, you called?

Lenny: *Punches him*

…

Marcus: Hey, Robbie, what's happening man?

Rob: GLORIA'S LEAVING ME! *Kicks him in the nuts*

…

Marcus: Kurt! Everyone's hurting me!

Kurt: *Sprays pepper spray in his eyes*

Marcus: OH GOD!

**Rule 10: If you touch Higgins cat, you're doomed.**

Eric: *Pats Toga, Marcus's cat* Nice kitty.

Toga: Meow. *Hisses and leaps onto Eric's face*

Eric: AHH GET IT OFF!

Lenny: *Tries to get Toga off Eric's face*

Toga: *Pounces on Lenny instead.*

Marcus: Guys? *Comes around corner*

Toga: *Jumps into his arms* Mrow.

**So there was Rules 1-10!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Rules for Living with the Grown Ups**

**Rule 11: If you are involved in a treasure hunt, don't let Greg read the map.**

Greg: *Looks at upside-down map*Okay, we need to go back 20 steps.

Charlotte: Rolls eyes and turns map around* we have to go FORWARD 20 steps.

Greg: I knew that.

Becky: No you didn't.

**Rule 12: If Donna has cake, don't take it from her unless you're Keithie.**

Keithie: Hey, Donna, could I please have some cake?

Donna: Sure! *Breaks off a bit and hands it to Keithie*

Greg: Can I have some?

Donna: GRRRR NO MY CAKE! MINE!

**Rule 13: If Higgins is alone on Valentines, be wise, keep your distance.**

*Lenny and Kurt watch Higgins from the door way, watching him sing 'Desperado' and other songs to Toga, his cat*

Lenny: Is it just me or has he gone…

Kurt: Insane? Yes.

**Rule 14: When Roxanne sits next to someone other than Lenny at the movies, she gets a little crazy.**

Roxanne: *Is sitting Next to Eric at the movies and he is rubbing up against her*

*5 mins*

*Popcorn is spilt all over Roxanne and she is glaring at the screen*

*30 mins*

*Eric is asleep and Roxanne is holding his head with one hand to keep him off of her*

*1 hour*

*Eric's head is on Roxanne and she's boiling.*

*1hr and 30 mins*

Roxanne: RRRRRRRRRR! *Leaves*

**Rule 15: If you hear fat noises, it's not real, it's Braden on Videoshop.**

*A big, loud fart noise is heard, and Lenny, Eric and Kurt poke their heads around the corner. Braden is sitting with his iPhone with Higgins*

Higgins: That gets you guys every time!

Braden: C'mon, a fart that big is fake, man.

Lenny, Eric and Kurt: *Roll eyes*

**Rule 16: The worst possible thing you can do is give Nick energy drinks. You're screwed.**

Nick: *Finds Red Bull on table* Mmmm. *Drinks it*

Sally: Did you just drink that?

Nick: Yeah, I did, why?

Sally: EVACUATE THE HOUSE!

Nick: WHOO HOO!

*Later*

*Higgins, Kurt, Lenny and Eric are in several places. Higgins buried in the snow outside, Kurt trapped in the bus, Lenny in the bathroom throwing up and Eric crying because Nick ate all his twinkies.*

**Rule 17: Do not, under any circumstances, let the boys play arrow roulette or bring out any big tires around Rob and Higgins.**

Lenny: Anyone up for some arrow roulette?

Rob: *Eyes widen and he piss bolts*

*Elsewhere*

Eric: Higgins, come here for a sec.

Higgins: Yeah, Eric what is it-,

*Sees Eric holding big tire*

Higgins: Oh, no. No, no, no, no! *Backs away*

Eric: Oh come on! *Steps forward like he's gonna chase him*

Higgins: *Piss bolts*

**Rule 18: If you wanna take a photo, make sure everyone's in it.**

Roxanne: *Looks through photo album* These are such good photos.

Sally: I just wish everyone was in one.

*Deane gets camera ready*

*Camera takes photo of the three girls*

*Camera takes photo of the boys*

*Takes photo of everyone except Nick, who cries.*

**Rule 19: If you want Charlotte to sing, sing with her.**

*Charlotte and Donna sit on Charlotte's bed*

Donna: Hey, Charlotte, you wanna sing together?

Charlotte: Sure! As long as you sing with me.

Charlotte and Donna: _And now you're just a ghost_

_When I look back never would have known that_

_You could be so cold_

_Like a stranger vanish like a vapor_

_There's just an echo where your heart used to be_

_Now I see it clearly_

_And there's just a pillow where your head used to sleep_

_My vision's 20/20_

_I see through you now _*both giggle*

**Rule 20: Don't interrupt a game of SingStar. They won't hear you.**

Roxanne: *Walks in on the boys playing SingStar* Lenny?

Higgins, Eric and Lenny: *Singing Pump it by the Black-Eyed Peas*

Lenny: *Winning*

Eric: *Losing*

Higgins: *Doesn't even know the words*

**There's the next lot of rules!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Rule 21: If you ever see a black cat, don't tell Fluzoo. It aggravates him.**

Higgins: I'm cursed… I just saw a black cat.

Fluzoo: *Gasp* RACIST!

Higgins: What, no, I didn't—

Fluzoo: RACIST! RACIST!

Higgins: -_-

**Rule 22: No 'Ave Maria' unless you're at a funeral.**

Rob: *Singing 'Ave Maria'*

*Windows break*

Lenny and Eric: *Exchange glances*

Kurt: Who died?

Rob: *Stops* No one, I just felt like singing. Problem?

Higgins: *To Lenny* Walk. Away.

**Rule 23: If you're going to prank someone, asks the 'Master of Pranks' for help, Peter Dante.**

Dante: Okay, everyone. Officer Dante's gonna school yas on how to prank a Feder.

Higgins: Will we be tested on this?

Dante: Shut it.

…

Lenny: *Is covered in egg* who put eggs in the balloons?

**Rule 24: Don't EVER convince Nick to dress in drag. He will do it and become Nicolette.**

Roxanne: Nick, truth or dare?

Nick: Dare.

Roxanne: I dare you to dress in drag.

Higgins: *Nearly chokes*

Lenny: Crazy lady!

Kurt: Oh please tell me he's not gonna… *Nick leaves* too late.

*2 minutes later*

*Nick enters wearing a red and white polka dot dress and a flower hat, wearing lipstick, blush and eye shadow and high heels.

Higgins: MY EYES!

Lenny: Oh my god what a weirdo.

Kurt: Lesbihonest.

**Rule 25: Don't do pick a card with Eric. You will be confused.**

Eric: *To Kurt* Pick a card!

Kurt: Aren't you meant to close your eyes?

Eric: I have closed my eyes.

*Kurt rolls his eyes and takes a card*

Eric: Now take a look and put it back.

*Kurt puts it back and Eric pulls it out.*

Eric: Was this your card?

Kurt: Aren't you supposed to shuffle the cards first?

Eric: NO!

**Rule 26: Please…don't bring up high school activities around the boys. **

Deane: I remember in high school, we did this really cool thing-*Muffled by Roxanne*

Lenny: Oh, that thing, wasn't that when we—

Rob: Let's go.

Sally: Deane!

Roxanne: Call 911.

Deane: This isn't an emergency!

*Hears screaming from the boys*

Roxanne: It will be sooner or later.

**Rule 27: They all have a song they find 'beautiful'. Do not disturb while this song is playing. And one more thing, it's not 'Sentimental Lady. They all have their own fav.**

Deane: So, Sally, spill, what's your 'beautiful' song?

Sally: Well, I—

*Hears teenage dream playing from a room.*

Sally: Seriously, who is that?

*They go look to see Nick sitting there lost in the song with his terrible off key singing*

Nick: Imma get your heart racing in my skin tied jean may your teenage dream be tonight…

Roxanne: I was expecting something gay, but not like this. *Walk off*

Higgins: *Pops up from behind couch* Think they expected anything?

**Rule 28: No tree climbing. Nuff said.**

*Donna, Charlotte and Keithie climb a tree, Keithie jumps up and down on a tree branch*

Charlotte: Keithie, cut it out, you're gonna get hurt.

*Snaps and Keithie falls*

Keithie: AHH MY LEG!

Donna: Keithie!

Charlotte: Not again…

**Rule 29: If Higgins has something on his mind he'll start acting weird. Brace yourself. It is really weird.**

Higgins: *Sits there slurping milk out of a straw*

Braden: Alright dad, spill.

Higgins: What?

Lenny: You did something weird, you got something on your mind.

Higgins: *Replies in gibberish*

Lenny and Braden: *Gives him weird look*

Braden: Dad, did you get hit in the head?

Higgins: Hmm?

Braden: Did you get hit in the head?

Higgins: No. AHH!

Lenny: What?

Higgins: What what? I didn't do anything.

Lenny: YOU JUST SCREAMED!

Higgins: Yeesh, don't need to yell at me.

Lenny and Braden: *Facepalms*

**Rule 30: Beware of the turtle monster.**

***A plastic turtle head moves along the ground by itself***

Rob: *Shit-scared* What is that thing?!

Nick: AHHHHHHHH

Higgins: WTF?!

Roxanne: UGH you chickens, it's just Toga! *Lifts up turtle head and sees nothing* AHHHH! *drops turtle head*

Lenny: *Holds remote control* HAHAHAHA YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN YOUR FACES!

Eric: CAUGHT THE WHOLE THING ON TAPE!

**A/N: I think this was the best set so far!**


End file.
